Hai I am educator. It lies with individuals and our willingness to share personal stories and not a few but many. That’s why I decided I had to overcome my own fear of telling my story. If none of us speak up, educators, students, physicians and other with mental illness will continue to feel alone and not get the care we need. But if we share our stories, we can begin to shatter the stigma and silence that surrounds mental illness for our profession and for ourselves.
I’m trying to say is eventough you are still single, lost your beloved one trust me, THERE IS A REASON BEHIND EVERYTHING. I had severe depression and turn to MDD (MAJOR DEPRESSIVE DISORDER)
Malaysian should know what SIGECAPS. Sigecaps is the mnemonic to medical student memorize to learn the core symptoms of depression : Sleep, Interest, Guilt, Energy, Concentratrion, Appetite, Psychomotor retardation, and Suicidality. I thought what I was feeling was normal for as an educator- wasn’t it? I hadn’t exercised in weeks and I couldn’t review pages of notes without daydreaming. I could not focus on my work either. But I had been so different as a educator. Most important, those daydreams would often dwell on how much easier it would be if everything would end- the last and most worrisome symptom of the mnemonic.
Alhamdulillah, aku berjaya selamatkan diri daripada membunuh diri. People don’t know how I’ve been struggling. The last symptom Malaysian perlu peka iaitu SUICICAL THOUGHT. Jangan sekali-kali tell a depressed person to treat their depression by solely reciting Quran. Why do we dot this to those who are depressed in our communities? Trust the Almight’s plans. Don’t expect too much from others sebab hal ini boleh membuatkan anda kecewa dan seterusnya depress.
Now, I was beginning to feel more like my old self. I had started focus on my work, sleep less and those fleeting thoughts had stopped. I WASN’T CURE, BUT I AS MANAGING. I was feeling better. However, I’ve also learned that despite the common nature of these maladies, they remain deeply stigmatized. This I know both professionally and personally. As someone who tires to be a voice for health care justice, and as educator who battles with mental illness, I should be a heroin in fighting stigma. Yet I’ve remained shamefully silent.
When my friends drop by my place, I sneak off to the other room to ensure that my pill bottle is well hidden. When Malaysian have posted about their mental health struggles on IIUM Confession, I haven’t mustered a comment of solidarity. I should have said : I have preexisting condition. Until today, the truth is I’m not alone in my silence. Each post at IIUM Confession more than 15% is about depression. Despite knowing its impact among our peers, and despite witnessing the transformative effect treatment can have, we in medicine continue to see mental illness as a weakness we don’t want to accept. Once a critical mass of afflicted and stigmatized people begin speaking up, perhaps the environment of fear, shame, and judgment can be extinguished, and norms can change.
Tolong jangan ambil pusing dengan perasaan orang lain dan tolong keluarga terdekat atau kawan korang yang menghadapi DEPRESSION. Its really affecting my life. I’m lost. Tollay lost. Hikmah di sebalik hal ini, Allah rindu tangisan hambaNya. Bagi sesiapa yang putus cinta, Allah inginkan cinta daripada anda sekalian dahulu. Hikmah lain lebih menghargai ibu bapa. Hikmah lain lebih menjaga solat. Cherish every single thing yang kamu ada sekarang. Hargai apa yang berlaku dalam hidup dan yakin kepada ALLAH dan yakin ada hikmah di sebalik apa yang berlaku.Jangan kecam sesiapa yang mengalami mental illness.
EDUCATOR
– EDUCATOR
Hantar confession anda di sini -> www.iiumc.com/submit