Assalammualaikum, untuk yang tengah sakit semoga disembuhkan, tengah kesempitan semoga dilapangkan, yang tengah bersedih semoga diberi ketenangan. I believe a lot of us are still adapting to this sudden change due to MCO and also the uncertain end of this Covid-19.
Sebab ada masa away from office la aku teringin nak rant sikit dekat confession page ni.
Disclaimer: Ni pengalaman peribadi. No need to be offended with what I disagree on in here cause I’m not here to point fingers. And if you have solid justification for doing things a certain way that is not conventional to others, then you no need to put weight on my words la kan.
1. Aku kerja dekat company kecik. So, normal la kalau ada perselisihan atau disagreement dengan colleague kan. Bagi aku benda tu normal. Tapi aku tak setuju bila kau start gang up against another colleague.
Hey, kau nak sakit hati tu tak payah la bawak satu office benci dekat orang lain. Yang lain-lain tu, you’re not even there to hear and see what exactly had happened, but you reacted like you experienced it firsthand.
Everyone has their own toxic side. Kau tak pernah gaduh or disagree dengan kawan-kawan kau? Eh aku tak percaya, sedangkan gusi dan lidah pun tergigit jadi ulcer huh.
Dengan kawan, kau faham dorang lebih, so kau takdela ambil hati sangat kalau dorang buat salah. Dengan colleague yang kau tak berapa rapat, dorang tersilap buat something terus kau gosipkan dengan orang lain sampai semua orang ditch dia.
So tell me, your colleague is not a precious person to his/her circle of friends and family like how you think of your own circles? So kau boleh assume macam-macam and tahikan dia dekat belakang dia? Macam mana kalau kau salah, tu bukan jatuh fitnah dah namanya? Eh childish la, kau insecure sangat ke sampai nak kena ada geng backup kau for your every action?
A good friend should not be a yes man. You can always share the problem but you can’t judge the other person la. Give them the benefit of doubt, maybe there are difficulties that you don’t see. Half the problem in a relationship is one’s assumptions. And perhaps the whole problem is your foul mouth?
2. Aku tak kisah la kau nak rapat dengan siapa pun sebab it’s humans nature to be drawn to those that share similar values with them. Maybe a favorite tv show, a favourite food, the same beliefs and so on. So bagi aku takde masalah la nak ada a circle of people yang kau rapat dekat office, seriously. Kita tak boleh nak get along dengan semua orang, tapi tak bermaksud kau kena ajak kawan-kawan kau ditch the rest.
Jangan la binary minded sangat. You can befriend everyone and be close to one or two, but it doesn’t mean you are against the rest right? Kau buat macam semua orang yang bukan clique kau adalah jahat dan nak jatuhkan kau, eh sekarang ni siapa yang busuk hati?
Ditching and trashing people are such an embarrassing act, but since you did it as a group it gives you a sense of power over people? Bak kata Seokjin “If we all gather our embarassment together it becomes confidence.” Eh Seokjin pun ntah-ntah tak sudi kau pakai quote dia untuk justify perangai kau tu.
3. Aku rasa better jauhkan diri dari orang lidah bercabang, talam dua muka dan tak serius dengan tanggungjawab. Selama aku kerja ni aku tak ambik port dan diam je. People think I’m oblivious to what they do or say behind me.
Masalah nya sekarang, aku bagi kau kerja kau taruk tepi, bila bos mintak progress kerja kau petik nama aku pulak. Hakikatnya dekat pc tu tengah gigih online shopping, download movie, gossip dekat group chat lain, scroll article, scroll resepi (Ingat bos tak nampak ke…)
Simpan kerja yang aku assign macam pekasam tapi pretend busy, cukup office hour baru return dekat aku dan cepat-cepat clock out. Kerja tu pulak semua salah, cincai, nampak sangat buat apa adanya. Bila aku suruh betulkan banyak kali, kau burukkan aku dekat colleague lain. Yang lain tu pun beli je apa yang kau jaja kan.
Kenapa kerja macam ni? Gaji nak cepat, claim setiap satu benda, berkira. Kalaupun kau rasa gaji kau sikit and kau punya prinsip “you get what you pay for”, but are you sure you are doing the bare minimum to amount to “what you’re paid for”?
With half the working hours spent on scrolling phone, switching between group chats, shopping online and delaying the progress of the team as a whole? Bila kena OT tak nak OT, and bila kena support the team you behaved as though you are doing them a favor.
“I’m only here to help out. No need to bother checking anything. No need to stay late to finish this tomorrow lusa tulat can also do. Just type or do it as it is, even if it seemed wrong. Jangan susahkan diri. Not my problem anyway.”
Whether people acknowledge you or not, I believe in doing the right thing – which is to do what is assigned to you as best as you can until you can really acknowledge this in your heart – “With what I do today I hope for berkat in my pay.”
Sure la no one can say how much or how less effort you should put, but I think people can see through your genuineness. Not everyone but, at least by doing your best you are at ease with yourself, isn’t it?
Dahla kerja main-main, belum masuk part sebarkan hal personal orang, dan jaja assumption kau. Benda kecik jadi besar, yang dituduh tak tau apa-apa. Korang je satu geng buat internal gossip dan sakit hati sesama sendiri.
Bro, sis, can you have some self control and keep your opinions to yourself, or at least go and verify your assumptions? From what I observe, you are the only one hurting now?
What good can result from hyping up your assumptions with a group of yes men, trashing the other person not knowing whether it is true or not? Will you solve anything with hostility and backstabbing? Does it make you richer by putting sands in other people’s rice pot?
I guess it only gives you temporary relief. Besok-besok kau sakit hati balik dan orang tu pun taktau kau tengah marah kat dia.
I observed a lot. I see the way you speak of someone else behind them (regardless of it being true or not) and I can already guess how you will speak of me in my absence. I see to what extent you’ll do to keep yourself in good light, and I make a note out of it that people of your type are the ones I should try to avoid my whole life. Horrible.
4. Dan aku sangat-sangat disagree bila ada ad hoc work, or bila kena OT dan datang kerja masa weekend, orang-orang single macam aku ni yang sentiasa kena turun.
We, single people, have a fair share of commitments that the other relationship-commited people have, fyi. Tak payahla bahagi kerja sama rata kalau betul commitment tak mengizinkan, aku faham, tapi boleh nampak la kau letak effort ke tak to make up for your position in the team.
Ni kau clock in clock out on time, hujung minggu taknak datang, kerja sendiri sedaya upaya nak taichi dekat orang lain. Benda-benda yang team mate kau tak mampu nak cover, kau pun tak nak take charge. Kenapa nak buat lebih-lebih kan, kau kan berkomitmen.
Kerja-kerja yang ditangguh-tangguh dan takde orang nak buat, ha sape lagi yang kena buat kalau bukan orang single macam aku dan orang-orang berkeluarga yang terpaksa berkorban untuk komitmen kau. Kerja korang-korang ni.
Aku sakit nak ambik mc, kena juga masuk office sebab kerja banyak. Nak ambik cuti dua tiga hari pun macam berdosa sangat. Orang lain boleh pulak.
Aku hampir accident pegi kerja sebab penat sangat non-stop OT malam dan weekend. Tak makan proper food berhari-hari sebab lunch pun kena kerja dan bila balik kerja dah penat sangat.
Berbulan-bulan tak balik kampung jumpa parents yang duduk jauh. Dorang sakit pun aku tak dapat bawakkan pegi check up, sebab aku kena kerja non stop everyday with all these deadlines and extra workload.
So that you’ll have the luxury to go dating everyday after work, try every freaking recipes you found on the web, plan outings dengan family on weekend, and visit every family member there is on this earth – because apparently you have ‘commitments’ and I do not as a single person! Bila aku bersuara, aku jugak yang salah kan.
Ha, ni la kemarahan terpendam aku. Kau play victim dan taichi kerja je reti. Aku tak kisah nak tolong, tapi there’s a line between helping you out and a charity work.
5. Ok here’s the benefit of doubt. Kalau kau dah buat sehabis baik, tapi employer tak appreciate kau. So you decide to give the bare minimum at your work (in the sense that you still deliver the scopes you’re being paid for), then do not get offended.
I understand that. As I said, if you have good reasons for doing what you do, then what I address here in this post doesn’t matter anymore. (Notes: Lagipun aku dah disclaimer tadi kan ni pengalaman peribadi dan aku just nak luahkan, so jangan la butthurt kalau kau tak buat.)
If you have commitments that require your utmost time and attention, then it is okay. As long as you clarify it with your colleagues, and do what you can to ease the team, then by all means you don’t have to come and work as long as the other colleagues.
The point is to try, and let know that you are trying. If people doesn’t accept it from you, then your best effort is self-explanatory to people who choose to see it. (Notes: People can feel it if you’re actually consistently putting effort or giving excuses, just saying)
If you are angry and dissatisfied with someone at your workplace, you are, of course allowed to rant and be angry. That is the healthy way. But don’t poison the relationship and disrupts the dynamics of the team by bringing someone else into the fight and make it theirs too.
Meluah boleh, berpada-pada lah. (Notes: Nak support kawan boleh, tapi jangan membabi buta macam kawan tu malaikat takkan buat salah punya.)
6. Aku pun ada toxic side aku sendiri, aku pun buat salah ok. Kalau marah, meh bincang depan-depan aku boleh explain kalau ada salah faham. Aku sangatlah ok untuk mintak maaf dan berubah kalau aku rasa feedback kau logik dan membawa kebaikan cewah.
Aku dah cuba tegur tapi kau tetap rasa kau tak salah dan kata diri teraniaya. Eh korang jangan buat macam ni kat orang lain please, kerja la betul-betul, duit tu jadi darah daging kau dan keluarga tau.
Jangan berprasangka sangat, kau jugak yang tak tenang nanti. Orang lain kadang-kadang buat hal sendiri pun kau nak jadikan point of attack.
Kalau kau rasa diam lebih baik, kau diam boleh tak? Tak payah “ni bukan nak mengumpat la tapi..”, “aku rase la kan dia tu….”, “oh hari tu kan, dia ni kan…”, eh kenapa shallow sangat topic conversation macam ni? Dunia yang luas kau sempitkan dengan tepi kain orang lain.
Pendek kata, live rightfully. In the sense that you’re able to justify it to yourself, your family and God that you’ve done your best in a rightful way. That you know whatever decisions and reactions you put out there, God is All-Knowing.
Tuhan bukan hanya di tikar sembahyang, berurusan dengan manusia pun kena ada rasa bertuhan. So kerja betul-betul, jangan nak carik salah orang je. Aku tau dekat luar ada orang experience worse than this at their workplace, tapi ahhh aku tetap nak luahkan jugak.
Bye…
– Ohoi (Bukan nama sebenar)
Hantar confession anda di sini -> https://iiumc.com/submit