Untuk part I, (https://iiumc.com/perempuan-straight-forward/).
Assalamualaikum people. Whoa, I never expected that there would be so many people who would be interested in my story! I thank you from the very bottom of my heart that you took the time to read such lengthy article. Terima kasih banyak-banyak. I really appreciate it.
I noticed a few things from the comments I read on facebook with regards to my confession, hahaha. Macam ramai orang rasa tak suka je aku tulis English. If I have offended you by writing in the language of the Colonials, I do apologise. However, perhaps it would be best if I clarify some issues. Aku bukan guna English sebab aku nak ‘acah-acah nak up’ (is that the correct term?). I grew up speaking in both English and Malay, both my parents encourage myself to be fluent in more than one languages. (I can speak a little bit of Arabic and Japanese, if you care to know). It just turns out that I feel more comfortable writing in English due to my lack of vocabulary in Malay Language. Tapi kalau kau rasa aku ni bajet je cakap English then terpulanglah, suit yourself.
I thank everyone who expressed support for me in the comment section. Betul, the guys that I have fallen for are all the shy, introverted type. I have never , ever fallen for a person based on his looks. I build emotional connections with people I am emotionally attracted to. To be honest, sorang pun aku tak rasa super handsome ke apa , just that I could picture building my life with them Hahahaha. I don’t think they share my sentiments tho’. In fact, one of them actually told me that people like them would be intimidated by people like me. He told me that just a few weeks shy of the day I decided to confess to him. HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH. Should have taken the hint then, but noooo, yo’ girl doesn’t give up that easily. Sorry not sorry :DDDDD.
Jokes aside, as I mentioned in my previous confession, I am still good friends with no.2 and no.3 . Very good friends in fact. We still hang out together (no.3) and I still feel comfortable sharing my life with him. Of course lah malu tu ada, risau kalau-kalau dia gelakkan aku dengan member laki lain kat belakang ke, but there is a reason why I confessed to him. To the best of my knowledge , he’s not the type to use others’ confessions as a way to increase his ‘worth’ amongst his male friends. My confession was not the first that he received anyway, another friend had confessed and was rejected as well. He discourages girls from confessing, dia kata be careful , setengah lelaki akan guna benda tu sebagain landasan untuk menaikkan value sendiri. I disagree obviously HAHAHAHAHAHA. Alah no.3, kau suka orang pun kau tak berani kasi tau, baik aku try je, kurang-kurang aku tau kau tak suka kat aku.
Aku tau setengah lelaki mungkin rasa compelled to take the first initiative, and you might feel threatened by a female such as myself, and it’s just too bad that I always fall for the ‘setengah’ yang rasa macam tu. I know a good looking friend of mine whose relationship started due to the girl’s initiative. Mungkin faktor rupa paras menyebabkan outcome confession kita berbeza, you lucky daughter of a gun. HAHAHAHAHA.
I noticed that a couple of the guys in the comment section are more interested in my physical appearance. Is that a guy thing? To judge a person based on what you could only perceive using your eyes? What about the eyes of the soul? What of what your heart says? I would hate it so, so badly if the reason I was rejected is how I look. I mean, these are my good friends, friends whom I’ve shared a lot with, and whom I’ve known for years prior to developing romantic feelings for them. But ah, to answer your question, yes? Am I pretty, yes? To be honest, I am a staunch believer of ‘Beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder’. Thus, it would be very hard to say if you would find me attractive. Mmhmm.
But both no.2 and no.3 think I’m pretty. No, I’m not kidding. Aku bukan tengah angkat bakul ok.
We are past that polite stage of being just acquaintances, they even feel comfortable enough to comment on my lipstick colour, or if some article of clothing doesn’t flatter me. We always membawang together, so when the told me that they find me physically above average, I am quite sure that they were not joking or throwing empty flattery. ( Or perhaps they are just that nice, stop flattering yourself Melati).
No.3’s crush has similar appearance to myself, so it is safe to it is probably not my looks that got me rejected. Ah, just to clarify tho, not everyone would find me pretty. I mean one of my female friends straight up told me she did not find me pretty. Some others told me that I’m too pale I look like a ghost . Takpe, putih-putih Melati, kan? (Or putih-putih ponti…). That’s fine I guess. Beauty does lie in the eyes of the beholder. Tak lawa kita pakai make-up , susah apa. I have a vast collection of lipsticks and the likes.
I don’t know if no.1 finds me pretty or not, he’s not even willing to be friends with me ( pompous fella, may we never cross paths again).
What else, what else? Oh yes, I feel so happy to read the success stories of some of my fellow forward ladies. Go girls!! Don’t allow social conventions to hold you back. Kalau nasib kau macam aku , kena reject memanjang, it’s ok, there are so many fishes in the sea. If the sea is not enough , lets move on to aquariums, Osaka has a big one as far as I know.
No.2 sekarang dah bertunang, huhu. Takpelah, nasib baik aku dah tak suka kat kau. I’m definitely going to his wedding, and I’m going to be genuinely happy that he has found a person he deems worthy of him. After all, we are friends right? How can I not be happy that you are tying the knot? Bukannya kau tau pun aku suka kat kau betul betul. Tu lah, ingat aku main main lagi. Habis tak dapat kahwin dengan aku :’).
HAHAHA meroyan apa pulak aku ni.
Setakat ni, I haven’t found another romantic interest yet. I hope next time, I would be brave enough to ask why, if I am to be rejected again. Ok lastly, I am not that young. My 24th birthday was in 2018, so nope, not that young anymore. Perhaps I just have a young soul :DDDDD.
I thank you again for reading through everything, and I hope next time we’ll meet again in an article which illustrates a happier story. Until then, insya ALLAH.
– Midnight Melati
Hantar confession anda di sini -> https://iiumc.com/submit